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Rainey

Joined: 29 Sep 2004 Posts: 2498 Location: Los Angeles, California, USA
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 1:31 am Post subject: Election Day Joke |
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I'm in a discussion about the contentiousness of our current election on another site (See, I can behave!).
I'm happy to say it's a civil, productive discussion even though it opened up with the business of Ted Haggard, evangelical religion and the manipulation of wedge issues and we are a diverse group on many sides of the political spectrum including avowed evangelical voters. As the discussion switched into another gear this morning once actual voting began, someone supplied this tension breaker:
A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was. He thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention. He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating.
"Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?" she asked.
"They're mating," her father replied.
"What do you call the spider on top?" she asked.
"That's a Daddy Longlegs," her father answered.
"So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?" the little girl asked.
As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question,
he replied "No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs."
The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then
took her foot and stomped them flat and said, "Well, we're not having any of that Brokeback-Mountain s**t in our garden." _________________ God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. -- Garrison Keillor |
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charlsy
Joined: 08 Aug 2006 Posts: 136 Location: France, Bordeaux
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 10:12 am Post subject: |
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Good joke !!!! I'm laughing right now, my coworkers are gonna think I lost it !
On another note, I hope you enjoy the election results... Yes, I did check them this morning, and I am kind of glad... But that's just me, looking at it from the other side of the Atlantic... |
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Debbie

Joined: 21 Feb 2005 Posts: 861 Location: Paris
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 1:55 pm Post subject: |
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Good one Rainey!!!
I nearly sprayed hot tea over my keyboard when I read the punchline.  _________________ If you cannot feel your arteries hardening, eat more cheese. If you can, drink more red wine. Diet is just "die" with a "t" on the end. Exercise is walking into the kitchen. |
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Griffin

Joined: 09 Jun 2006 Posts: 932 Location: England
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 5:39 pm Post subject: |
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Doh! It's the Daddy Longlegs I feel sorry for... tho' when she finally gets to see Them! she'll have nightmares for days!!!!
Also, it's hard to run when you're mating... er, so I'm told! ahem! _________________ Confusion comes fitted as standard. |
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Donna

Joined: 14 Oct 2005 Posts: 827 Location: Oakland, CA
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 5:41 pm Post subject: |
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Good one Rainey!  _________________ L'appetit vient en mangeant. -Rabelais |
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David
Joined: 30 Sep 2004 Posts: 1855 Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 5:55 pm Post subject: |
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M Merci Rainey Sounds like a lively and diverse group. Hope you all behave. _________________ Vivant Linguae Mortuae!! |
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Erin
Joined: 18 Oct 2004 Posts: 1654 Location: Within view of Elliot Bay, The Olympics and every ship in the Sound
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 6:19 pm Post subject: |
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Nice one! _________________ "It's watery....and yet there's a smack of ham."
"It's hot ham water." |
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Rainey

Joined: 29 Sep 2004 Posts: 2498 Location: Los Angeles, California, USA
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 9:46 pm Post subject: |
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charlsy- The relief of this election is enormous. I hope the next one brings more relief and a hope to repair many of the wounds we've inflicted on ourselves and on old and valued allies. _________________ God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. -- Garrison Keillor |
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Erin
Joined: 18 Oct 2004 Posts: 1654 Location: Within view of Elliot Bay, The Olympics and every ship in the Sound
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Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 10:45 pm Post subject: |
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Beautifully put Rainey. _________________ "It's watery....and yet there's a smack of ham."
"It's hot ham water." |
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Rachel
Joined: 22 Oct 2006 Posts: 296 Location: Santa Barbara, CA
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Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 12:24 am Post subject: |
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Rainey, thanks for a good laugh - though I must say I haven't stopped smiling since I first read the newspaper this morning. The sense of relief here in the UK is tremendous. |
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Griffin

Joined: 09 Jun 2006 Posts: 932 Location: England
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Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 7:17 am Post subject: |
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Yeah, wot Rachel said! Definitely. _________________ Confusion comes fitted as standard. |
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Rainey

Joined: 29 Sep 2004 Posts: 2498 Location: Los Angeles, California, USA
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Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 7:43 am Post subject: |
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Man! If you think you're relieved there, you have no idea what it seems to be like here.
I know I stand out on one side of the political spectrum but on that other non-political forum that I first referenced above, everyone around the country is saying that they're very pleased and hopeful again. With such a 180 degree change you'd expect a good bit of grousing and dire predictions. I've heard exceptions to some regional results (state governorships changed from Republican to Democrat, and state legislatures went uniformly Democratic too) but they are pleased with the net effect across the board. I guess I haven't been the only one thinking I was living inside CRAZY....
Even the opposing political parties are talking tonight about real reconciliation and cooperation we haven't had in 30 years around here. I guess they just got too tired to keep swinging. But hooray for some sanity to work on constructive solutions to real world problems.
Join us in hoping that all our internal and foreign relations can and will be rebuilt. _________________ God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. -- Garrison Keillor |
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charlsy
Joined: 08 Aug 2006 Posts: 136 Location: France, Bordeaux
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Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 9:15 am Post subject: |
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And the good news this morning was my radio waking me up and saying the senate had swung too ! I'm glad, and hope, as you say it Rainey, that some of the breaches in old friendships will be mended, and that also a good solid measure of good will be poured on your country ! From what I read in US papers, change seems sorely needed...
Good luck to all of you across the Atlantic ! |
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Erin
Joined: 18 Oct 2004 Posts: 1654 Location: Within view of Elliot Bay, The Olympics and every ship in the Sound
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Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 2:03 pm Post subject: |
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I have become very jaded over the last several years, now......now I feel elation, pure and simple. I haven't had hope in a long time. _________________ "It's watery....and yet there's a smack of ham."
"It's hot ham water." |
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Chicago Bear

Joined: 02 May 2005 Posts: 240 Location: Chicago
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Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 6:14 pm Post subject: |
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Rainey's joke reminded me of one that's similar:
A man was walking with his young daughter through the park. It was a pleasant moment, mid-fall, with the election safely over and the forces of darkness--for the moment--in retreat. They came upon two dogs, mating. Daddy, what are they doing? the young girl asked. The father, never at a loss for words, said, ahhhhhhh, the dog on top has a hurt paw, and the other dog is, ahhhhhhhhhh, helping him home. The girl thought about this for a moment, and said "Dad, that's the trouble with this world. You try to do someone a favor, and you end up getting screwed." _________________ The goal is to fit it all in. |
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